Cleveland Indians Resolutions for 2014

Aug 8, 2013; Cleveland, OH, USA; Cleveland Indians first baseman

(33) leaves the field with right fielder

(9) after Raburn pitches the ninth against the Detroit Tigers at Progressive Field. Mandatory Credit: Ken Blaze-USA TODAY Sports

Today is the final day of 2013. At the stroke of midnight, we will flip the calendar over and start anew. For many of us, this means making resolutions that will hopefully make us a better person in the coming year. The most common resolutions tend to revolve around losing weight, quitting a vice, or finding a way to help others. For the Indians, making a New Year’s resolution is a bit more difficult. After all, they are not an individual person, but rather an organization made up of several dozens of individuals working together to achieve a common goal.

So what exactly should be the Indians resolutions for 2014. After wracking my brain, I was able to come up with five logical resolutions for the new year that could help make the Indians an even better organization than they already are. So, without further ado, I present to you the top five New Year’s Resolutions for the Cleveland Indians.

Aug 12, 2013; Minneapolis, MN, USA; Cleveland Indians shortstop

(13) throws the ball to first base in the second inning against the Minnesota Twins at Target Field. Mandatory Credit: Jesse Johnson-USA TODAY Sports

Resolution #1: Save Money

For the Indians, this is a no brainer. After breaking the bank last winter to sign Nick Swisher and Michael Bourn, the Dolan’s wallets have been under lock and key for most of this offseason. As a small market team, they need to be frugal with their spending. So far so good on that front. While the rest of baseball has been ready and willing to spend extravagant sums of money and commit multiple years to lesser player, the Indians have been content to just sit back and wait for the right move and the right player to come to them.

In order to better help accomplish this resolution, that means the Indians should continue to hold off on spending money on a weak free agent class. Rather, they should focus on improving the roster via trade. Baseball in the year 2014 is less about trading players and more about trading contracts. This mean dumping undesirable salaries and acquiring players with multiple years of team control remaining on existing contracts. Look for the Indians to make a move for pitching by moving their best remaining trade asset, Asdrubal Cabrera and his $10-million salary for 2014.

Aug 1, 2013; Cleveland, OH, USA; Cleveland Indians manager

(17) signs autographs for fans before the game against the Chicago White Sox at Progressive Field. Mandatory Credit: Ken Blaze-USA TODAY Sports

Resolution #2: Help Others

The Cleveland Indians do a great job of helping the community through their community outreach program, Cleveland Indians Charities. Every year they do a number of promotions and events aimed at helping the community, particularly those less fortunate and children that are dealing with sickness.

This resolution is admittedly less of a change and more of a promise to continue to doing what they have been doing over the past 25 years. That being, helping those who need it. So far, since their inception in 1989, Cleveland Indians Charities has raised in excess of $9-million to benefit youth oriented agencies and organizations throughout Northeast, Ohio. Bravo.

Resolution #3: Help Slider Lose Weight

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but Slider, the lovable mascot of the Indians, could stand to lose a few pounds. While he has never been a model of physical well-being, he certainly has seen better days. His ever-growing spare tire is a symbol of excess and gluttony that needs to be put into check. I’m sure there are also a number of other underlying health problems that Slider should have addressed. For example, what is his cholesterol? Is he pre-diabetic? What is his BMI?

Someone should get slider to his primary care physician ASAP to get these things checked out. Actually, does Slider even have a primary care doctor, or has he not been to a doctor in over 10 years like most young adult males? On the flip side, I feel sorry for the poor doctor that has to administer that exam. How does one go about checking the prostate of a large, magenta, fluff ball? Does he even have a prostate to be checked? This all leaves us with so many more questions than answers.

Aug 5, 2013; Cleveland, OH, USA; Cleveland Indians manager Terry Francona (17) watches the Detroit Tigers batting practice before the game at Progressive Field. Mandatory Credit: Ken Blaze-USA TODAY Sports

Resolution #4: Get a Better Education

Teams are always looking for ways to get ahead. What better way to get ahead then through education? Baseball has become less about simply outspending everyone else and more about outsmarting the opposition. Advanced statistical analysis and Sabermetrics have aided considerably in making the latter possible. Therefore, the Indians should invest heavily on educating themselves in the newest ways to evaluate talent.

Admittedly, the Indians already do an above average job when it comes to analyzing players beyond the traditional batting average, RBI, and wins by pitchers. However, there is always room for improvement. Maybe through their education they develop a new and interesting way to assess talent. Maybe this makes them better prepared for the draft. Maybe this makes them better able to swindle opposing teams at the trading deadline. Either way, you can never be too smart or too educated. For the Indians, this seems almost like a necessity.